If I were a lib'ril...

[hammAR]

First, I'd eat some tofu an' rice cakes with Perrier an' then I'd go walkin' aroun' the neighborhood ta spy on the peoples to see if anyone was smokin' cigarettes or cuttin' trees up or cleanin' guns & stuff so's I could call up the local guv'mint orifice an' start a movement ta make em' stop doin' stuff I don't like.

Then I'd send some money ta' Hillary an' also Obama sos I'd feel good about passin' ammo ta' the DNC ta' use on the evil Republicans.

Then I'd watch Ellen Degenerate on TV an' Oprah too..

I'd wanna help out some gay folks force gayness down the throats of 1st graders in public school, an make sure there warn't no religion in the classroom. No bibles an' no Jesus..then I'd send a check ta Brandeis an' Harvard so they could put in foot baths fer the Islamic stoodints. Ya see, Christianity is easy ta slam, but not Islam, cause that's just the way it is now..an' the conservatives can't or won't do dick about it.

I'd then start figgerin' out more ways ta infringe on the 2nd amendmint an get the guns outa the hands of law abidin' Americans. That way, only the police will have guns. Then we can start workin' on gettin' the guns outa the hands of the police. What's that you say?..Only criminals will have guns? Cause the nature of criminals is to NOT obey the laws? Well,..I don't even want to go there cause your argument is silly an' stoopid..everybody knows that. An' you can stuff the FBI an' NRA statistics rite up your patriotic Republican ass ok?

Now I would open a quart of Ben & Jerry's chunky monkey an' sit on my ass in front of the TV an' wait fer Desperate Hosebags ta come on, an' also Letterman..In tween I'd have CNN on..

Then I'd crawl inta my bed an' spank the monkey thinkin' about Madelaine Halfbright and Janet Rambo makin a sammich outa me..........................a sammich that will sqeeze the devil out.




Shamelessly stolen .................

[nyffman]

Shamelessly stolen .................

From who? I'm gonna shamelessly steal it too.

[1911fan]

quote "Then I'd crawl inta my bed an' spank the monkey thinkin' about Madelaine Halfbright and Janet Rambo makin a sammich outa me." now there's a visual image that makes me want to gouge out my eyes.

[gunnerbmg]

go Gunny

[cobb]

quote "Then I'd crawl inta my bed an' spank the monkey thinkin' about Madelaine Halfbright and Janet Rambo makin a sammich outa me." now there's a visual image that makes me want to gouge out my eyes.

Really, I thought it was pretty funny and original. Then that part came up and all I could think was that how sick it was, and maybe true.

[justaguy]

There is nothing about rising my taxes.

[BRIT_in_the_weeds]

Then I'd crawl inta my bed an' spank the monkey thinkin' about Madelaine Halfbright and Janet Rambo makin a sammich outa me..........................a sammich that will sqeeze the devil out.

He done forgot to mention they're wearing buttless chaps and strapon dildees

[Molasses]

If you were to become a lib'ril....

You'd have a whole pile of Get Well cards next to your hospital bed sayin' how sorry people were to hear about the accident and all that dain bramage.

[nyffman]

If you were to become a lib'ril....

You'd have a whole pile of Get Well cards next to your hospital bed sayin' how sorry people were to hear about the accident and all that dain bramage.