by yukonjasper on Wed Mar 19, 2008 6:24 pm
This is a good topic. I had my permit for about 18 months. I couldn't wrap my brain around why I would ever need to carry. I'm 6'2" and about 270, so I always figured I wouldn't be a target. I got my permit because I could and I'm a strong supporter of the 2nd amendment, so it was a statement for me at first.
I looked high and low for the right CCW and sort of fell into a situation where a Glock 36 presented itself to me. The guy I got it from already had the paddle holster the exta mags and the right SD ammo. It was packaged up and ready to go. I took the G36 to the range that day, put 150 rounds through it. I absolutely loved the gun and felt comfortable shooting it.
Well at that point the only thing left was to get comfortable wearing it out. I was freaked out about the possibility of an AD until I reasoned that as long as the gun stayed in the holster, it was almost inpossible for it to AD. I jumped right into carrying hot because I have confidence in the Glock design (I'm just getting used to my Bersa Thunder -the decocker still sort of freaks me out). I started carrying when I took the dog for a walk. Then I'd leave it on instead of taking it off right away around the house. I'd wear it to the range and back. I'd run a few errands on the way to and from the range -pulling my shirt or jacket down like a frickin maniac at first, but less and less everytime I went out. I began to start wearing it all day Saturdays as I went about my business and basically anytime I left the house. I found myself getting so used to wearing it that you are not immediately aware that you have it on.
It felt comforting knowing that others could rely on me if the SHTF and I absolutely had my back against the wall that I wouldn't be helpless. I used to work out and get big, so I wouldn't have to fight, in the adult world physical size doesn't matter as much if the Bad Guy can project his evil in some other way than hand versus hand combat. Knife, bat, brick or gun -they won't be used on me because I'm arguing with someone, they'll be used against me or people around me randomly and without regard for human decency. Since its much more effective to carry a G36 than a Louisville Slugger, that is what I choose to make sure that I can become a force for good, should I be called upon do so. Sorry, sort of running on there, but I wanted to give you sense for what I believe is the reverence you need to have while you accept the awesome responsibility. I believe you are the type of guy who understands that, so allow youself to know what kind of a person you are inside and that will put you at peace with the power that will be strapped to you. You are the one in charge of the weapon and yourself. If you are quietly confident, you'll be fine. If you start carrying like a cowboy or a JackAs$ then its good to have people around you that will let you know.
I don't carry at work as I'm in an office situation and I know they would frown on me if I were discovered, so its a part time thing for me. I also do not carry in any situations where I will be drining alcohol. I do not have to worry about a wife or girlfriend thing, but I have had some women I've dated object (that obviously eliminated them) and others who are OK with it and on rare occassion, its sort of a turn on - I guess. As for friends, I don't typically advertise that I'm carrying and because I don't, they don't ask. It really is pretty amazing how little people pay attention.
I guess the upshot of all this is to say that its a mental thing work into it gradually and fully explore how you are feeling when you carry. Don't be afraid, you are potentially a force for good. In my mind, that is something to be proud of.
Deo Adjuvante Non Timendum - (with the help of God there is nothing to be afraid of)
Spectamur Agendo - (We are proven by our actions)
Non Ducor, Duco - (I am not led, I lead)
NRA Life Member