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Re: A bit of a Curfuffle...

PostPosted: Thu Aug 30, 2012 3:42 pm
by brent375hh
I know people who think that nothing bad will ever happen to them only "other" people.
Some of them buy lottery tickets and think they have a chance of winning the powerball, yet never have a chance of a violent encounter.

Re: A bit of a Curfuffle...

PostPosted: Thu Aug 30, 2012 3:53 pm
by GunGoogler
Kokeba07 wrote:
rtk wrote:I have been married 30+ years and have had two " situations" where the wife looked at me like....Oh crap, I hope you got that thing on you!!!

Still married and will most likely live happily everafter! :twisted:



This is part of her argument she says she cant see a reason to carry i have never even come close to being in a fight or having a situation that would warrant a firearm in her opinion.


Given that, the difference between carrying and not carrying may be living to come close to the second situation that would warrant a firearm in her opinion. Absent the firearm, you are far less likely to survive the first.

I'll echo what many have said, don't try to convince her. Give her information and outlets to learn on her own. Figure out just how much of an issue this is for her before you start drawing hard lines. Let's hope it isn't the case, but if it is--your gun or her...be prepared to make a choice. I know which one I would choose.

I have brought several of my friend's girls shooting for the first time because it is less stressful for them, but there is a long way from being happy to shoot and being comfortable carrying or being around a carrier. Don't try to apply logic to irrational reactions...it will never add up.

Re: A bit of a Curfuffle...

PostPosted: Thu Aug 30, 2012 3:53 pm
by Kokeba07
i do have a bit of a head start because she is not anti gun she is fine with getting one just not sure on the carrying part.

Re: A bit of a Curfuffle...

PostPosted: Thu Aug 30, 2012 4:00 pm
by Heffay
Buy her a pair of running shoes then, and say "if we can't defend ourselves, let's at least get really really good at running away."

Avoid the follow-on "and, of course... you know...." /hold hands about ass width apart.

Re: A bit of a Curfuffle...

PostPosted: Thu Aug 30, 2012 4:28 pm
by Scratch
I have a similar problem with my wife. Im 42 now and started duck hunting at age 15. I've been married now for over 15 years. She knew I owned guns, and that I liked them, but honestly... since we had kids about 12 years ago, my hunting has pretty much stopped. So since then, she hasn't heard much about guns from me other than the occasional "I'm going shooting with some buddies at Bill's Gun Shop" or the random hunting trip every other year or so, or the rare new gun purchase every 5 years or so.

And it wasn't until this past November when I as a Wisconsinite, could leagally carry concealed, that I got my license to do so. She wasn't on board with that idea at all. She is NOT a gun person at all. She doesn't like them, is scared of them, has never had ANY desire to touch one or be near one. Her mother is the type that says out loud every time she picks up a kitchen knife "Oh I just hate knives!" So I understand where she gets it from.

She "accepted" the fact that I was going to take the carry classes and get my CCL, but she didn't think I'd be carrying much. To be honest, during school months, I don't because most of the trips we make out of our house is to and from school and we are pretty active in the volunteer part of our school, so I leave it at home, but I carry whenever else I can, and almost constantly during the summer. I just never tell her. We got into it one time when going to a grad party and she wanted me to leave it home, but now I just never tell her. She knows I carry most of the time... she's not "really" happy about it most of the time either, but she's accepted it and moved on I guess. At least I don't hear about it anymore.

There were a few times when she told me she was glad that I was carrying, but not much. And with a recent random stabbing in our sleepy little town of Hudson, she's warming up to it.... hopefully she'll one day even go so far as to touch one of my guns... hey a guy can dream right?

She's not much of a reader so she won't be reading the book, she's way too busy with work anyways. And there's no way she'd ever want to take a class. So I'm kind of in the same boat as you, hopefully I'll get something from this thread too.

I'm still not sure how I snuck in the whole "Hey Honey... I'm going to become an 01 gun dealer from home" thing.... but I did!

Re: A bit of a Curfuffle...

PostPosted: Thu Aug 30, 2012 5:57 pm
by AFTERMATH
Have her take the P2C class with you.

Re: A bit of a Curfuffle...

PostPosted: Thu Aug 30, 2012 6:04 pm
by Kokeba07
Yea she said she would i want to get her to the range but she is so busy and the only other shooter that we know to take her is my dad and he intimidates her more than me. So the ladies night at Bills sounds like something i could suggest to her. because she has expressed interest in shooting.

Re: A bit of a Curfuffle...

PostPosted: Thu Aug 30, 2012 6:22 pm
by Humphrey Bogart
Ditto on the Cornered Cat...her website is good...

Also Google Oleg Volk and 'A human right'....he is a prolific poster maker and photographer and he puts the big picture into one poster...He's a Russian Jewish imigrant (as a teenager) with ties to Minneapolis.

Here I googled it for you: http://www.a-human-right.com/

He's remarkably persuasive and I think he presents his points in a manner that don't make the reader go defensive. More Cerebral than Kathy Jackson / Cornered Cat.

Just discovered this on his site....he has a very active sense of humor as well.

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A bit of a Curfuffle...

PostPosted: Thu Aug 30, 2012 7:21 pm
by ronin069
mrShinola wrote:My wife pats me down every time I leave the house. If I'm not carrying I am told " you're not leaving this house unless you are properly armed."

God, I love that woman :D


Same here. I too, am very fortunate.

Until you come to a meeting of the minds regarding this topic...concealed is concealed.

Consider it solid tactical carrying practice!

Re: A bit of a Curfuffle...

PostPosted: Thu Aug 30, 2012 9:55 pm
by LarryFlew
Kokeba07 wrote:
rtk wrote:I have been married 30+ years and have had two " situations" where the wife looked at me like....Oh crap, I hope you got that thing on you!!!

Still married and will most likely live happily everafter! :twisted:



This is part of her argument she says she cant see a reason to carry i have never even come close to being in a fight or having a situation that would warrant a firearm in her opinion.


You have life insurance and you're not dead. Car insurance, house insurance, insurance against theft, liability insurance? Carrying is the Same thing, but less $ and more fun. Hope you never need ANY of those things.

Re: A bit of a Curfuffle...

PostPosted: Thu Aug 30, 2012 11:59 pm
by Kokeba07
Some of it has to do with me only being 23 and her feeling im still a little immature but that comes from her not seeing me shoot and be around firearms and see the respect and utmost care i use when i am around and operating them.

Re: A bit of a Curfuffle...

PostPosted: Fri Aug 31, 2012 6:44 am
by Heffay
Kokeba07 wrote:Some of it has to do with me only being 23 and her feeling im still a little immature but that comes from her not seeing me shoot and be around firearms and see the respect and utmost care i use when i am around and operating them.


She's probably also seen you drunk. ;-)

Re: A bit of a Curfuffle...

PostPosted: Fri Aug 31, 2012 6:57 am
by plblark
LarryFlew wrote: Carrying is the Same thing, but less $ and more fun.
Right ..... :-)

Ok, the Carrying part isn't terribly expensive. It's the collection of gear, gadget, and toys that gets expensive.

Re: A bit of a Curfuffle...

PostPosted: Fri Aug 31, 2012 6:58 am
by Heffay
plblark wrote:
LarryFlew wrote: Carrying is the Same thing, but less $ and more fun.
Right ..... :-)

Ok, the Carrying part isn't terribly expensive. It's the collection of gear, gadget, and toys that gets expensive.


It's not expensive. It's an investment. It goes under the savings part of the budget.

Re: A bit of a Curfuffle...

PostPosted: Fri Aug 31, 2012 7:14 am
by KC8SON
I had this discussion with my girlfriend when I started carrying. I asked her if she trusted me to be responsible while driving her kids. She was. I then asked her why she felt that I would suddenly become irresponsible while carrying a gun. I have taken training - including the John Farnam class that Bob Jahn coordinated and kept her informed as to my thoughts and concerns. I told her that the John Farnam class made me more aware of my limitations. She sees and knows that I'm being responsible and taking it seriously.